What are Ritual and Ceremony?
Both Ritual and Ceremony:
Offer us a pause from the daily tasks and guide us into sacred space
Remind us what it is we value most
Tap us into our subconscious, connecting us to what lies below the surface, often our deepest wisdom
Connect us to our emotions on the surface and below
Validate our feelings about a transition/change
Slow us down to acknowledge 3 things; What Was, What Is, and Wonder into What Lies Ahead
Ceremony:
Is a structure or container that holds a series of rituals as a way of honoring change
Tells our story with honesty and wonder
Connects us to Community, allowing us to feel held, supported, and seen just as we are
Reminds us that life is filled with endings and new beginnings,
Makes space for grief and for celebration
Occurs less often than ritual, usually for (but not limited to) lifecycle transitions
Ritual:
Is performed as set of sacred actions that make up a ceremony or can be performed on its own
Is a visual, creative representation of a deeper meaning, our subconscious
Connects us to magic, mystery, that which we cannot see
Connects us to ancestors, legacy, the wisdom of the earth
Can align us to our own rhythms and cycles and/or those of the earth
May occur more often than ceremony
What is a Rite of Passage?
Simply put, a Rite of Passage is a ceremony that acknowledges a specific life transition. It defines the threshold between one chapter and the next. When these transitions are honored with simple or elaborate rituals, with community present and stories shared, we find ourselves with a new sense of purpose, direction, and wholeness. In this space, we feel connected to others and to ourselves more deeply, as we step into our new role.
An intentional Ritual and Ceremony can:
Create space for growth and connection to ourselves and our community
Remind us that challenge and struggle lead us to competence and empowerment
Shine light on our unique strengths and gifts that we have to offer
Solidify values, responsibilities, and commitments
Make space for loss, grief, celebration, and hope
Why choose to honor these life transitions?
We are leading fast-paced lives. As time flies by, we can miss opportunities to notice changes in our selves and our children. Sometimes life hands us change whether we want it or not! Without the pause, we may miss the opportunity to reflect, honor, and heal.
Our culture doesn’t support this process of growth, as it once did. Many people come to me with a curiosity about my Ritual and Ceremony work; they are intrigued but feel it’s “not them” or they could never do it on their own. I felt that way too! But then I discovered it can be done to reflect the unique values of my family. I realized that ceremony can be simple or grand. I have found a way to use timeless ceremony structure in a simple format to make it accessible to anyone.
Examples of Rituals and Ceremonies:
Mother Blessings
Transition into Adolescence
Marriage or Commitment Ceremonies
Transition into Elderhood
End of Life Ceremonies
Teen launching
Miscarriage
Entrustment Ceremony for Adoption
Divorce
Many more!
Examples of Childhood and Teen Ceremonies:
Hayden's Ceremony, age 8
Hayden’s parents are intentional and consciously building a nature-loving family. They talked about patterns of parenting they were ready to let go of. They were curious about ceremony as they saw clear shifts in their daughter but were skeptical if an organized ceremony would be “too out there”.
After 6 meetings over the course of 4 months, they felt newfound acceptance and encouragement for both their children. Together we co-designed a community ceremony acknowledging Hayden’s transition into Middle Childhood. Family and friends gathered and entered a large circle, sharing stories and love. Hayden then spent time in her woods, near her fairy houses, and was welcomed back into the circle for a ribbon ceremony where family and friends shared commitments of love and support. At the end of her ceremony she was given a beautiful kitchen knife to help prepare family meals.
“We became better and more conscious parents, our daughter stepped beautifully into her own, and the blossoming of her confidence was something we could all support and all benefit from. It strengthened our family, our community and our beliefs, and is an experience we will carry with us as a source of strength into the coming years.”
Teelin’s Ceremony, age 9
Teelin's Mom and family was familiar the ceremony and his Mom was intrigued about the idea of honoring the shifts he was going through, this 9-Year transition. His project was to create a fire pit at their house, built with stones that held memories for their family.
On the day of the ceremony, Teelin, along with family support at his grandparent's home, prepped homemade pie and tea for the celebration after, as well as set up his sit-spot near the lake, for his brief quiet time alone.
His family gathered with stories and wishes for him and he was walked to his sit-spot by his Uncle. After time at his sit spot, caring for his small fire and making a wish for himself, he had visitors come with stories and meaningful offerings to his fire and lake.
Teelin was welcomed back with with cheers and a favorite song sung by all.
“Taking time to pause and honor Teelin with a Rites of Passage ceremony was such a rich and powerful experience. We celebrated him today and the wonderful 10 yr old he truly is and also bestowed onto him many wishes for the exciting years ahead. It allowed for a tremendous amount of reflection, for all family members who participated, and will be a day spent together we will always remember fondly.”
Clementine's Ceremony, age 15
Clementine’s parents were very clear in their intention to mark their daughter’s transition into Adolescence before High School began. But they had no tradition to fall back on. Her parents, along with Clementine, were excited to learn and grow through the process.
Together we co-created a process and ceremony that shined light on Clementine’s strengths and challenges, created space for mentoring and connection while sharing the family values, and offering her a challenge to overcome. She prepared for and completed a 4-mile solo-hike to the summit of Mount Monadnock. She brought letters of love with her and descended down the mountain to her parents and younger siblings proudly awaiting her return.
“It was so clear that going through this process made Clementine understand the responsibilities and privileges of an older child. It also celebrated who she is and who she aspires to be. She really earned our trust. I think she knows this now and it gives her a real sense of confidence.”